You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Define "chronic" masturbator.
before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
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