worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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