no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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