Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
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