i broke my thumb. i no longer have 2 opposable thumbs. i'm sub-human. i love vicodin.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
I'll just put on a bunch of mascara and cry right before I get there. Then everyone will recognize me.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
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