he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.