Already got asked if we're dating
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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