you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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