I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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