I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
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