They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize