at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize