Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I am not exagerating when I say the thought "screw you future me" actually just went through my head
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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