I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
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