I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
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I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
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I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?