It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
25 People Confess The Biggest Betrayal They Have Ever Faced
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
25 Odd Things These Pathetic People Do For Enjoyment
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?