farters have to be the big spoon...
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Congratulations! We have a period
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