with your own penis?
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
I am sweating out the vodka to make room for the whiskey tonight.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
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