I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
These 25 People Had Very Inappropriate Sexual Relations(hips)
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
These 31 People Are Lazier Than You Could Ever Imagine
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket