I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess