Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
whose ass print is on the piano?
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
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