Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
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