shes about as inviting as chlamydia
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Randomize
