honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
oh yeah. preciate
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making