dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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