4 words: hood of his car
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.