Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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