Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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