I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
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