there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
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