That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I got snowed in at my parent's. everyone's asleep so I'm smoking a joint in my old room and watching Tarzan on a 12" tv.
They must be so glad to have you home...
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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