i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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