yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
Randomize
