reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
21 Disappointing Confessions From Teenage Fathers
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea