STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
