when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize