I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize