I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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