I looked at my own cervix.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Awkward moment #23: reasuring mom that the bf and I aren't having sex as seamen is running down my leg...
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
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