GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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