So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize