3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
smell my finger.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
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