just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
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I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
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My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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