the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize
