I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
I’m gonna slowly take you in my mouth and push you deep into my throat so my lips are right up against your body and then I’m gonna fucking bite your shit off if one more of our friends shows me a snap you took while I was giving you head. Are we clear?
Randomize