yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize