All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
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