Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They made up a new version of "Smash or Pass" called "I would(n't) let you sit on my face" to yell at the freshman
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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