I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
