Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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