Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
That's how pantless uber rides happen
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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